Classichammer

I was in a discussion about starting armies, and "too many models" came up as a reason not to start one. As a result I started wondering just how numerous are the various armies and proceeded to design the smallest and largest possible 2000 point armies by base count for everyone (i.e. most war machines end up counting as 4 models, while a stegadon with 5 skinks on it counts as one).
These are the results (army lists not included, but I can provide them on request). Chaos is Mortals, Daemons and Beasts in one list, though the final lists had no daemons. Empire can take steam tanks.

Most of the giant armies look almost reasonable, with the notable exception of Skaven, Ogres, and Chaos who run around with giant units to get that high.

Most of this isn't surprising. Access to chariots, swarms or monstrous infantry in core keeps numbers down, with cavalry coming in second. Really cheap fodder models gets numbers high. Having expensive or multiple required characters cuts into maximum numbers.

The interesting parts were how few dragons and how many chariots were in the lists. It almost always turned out that picking a less expensive mount than a dragon kept final numbers down because you could grab a hero that cost enough that you could just avoid having to start taking cheaper models. That is: two characters on lesser mounts usually cost more points than a character on a dragon and the cheapest non-character model you had to take once the expensive models were claimed. One army did keep a dragon, and it's not the one I expected.

Also, it's interesting that Wood Elves, High Elves and Tomb Kings must be elite, while Chaos and Ogre Kingdoms can choose.

Sadly, because of the overly elaborate models, I'm not sure I'd want to paint most of the minimum size armies. Most have multiple units that are hard to paint once assembled. Wood Elves might actually be the easiest of the bunch—no chariots, gyrocopters, or integral gnoblars. They still have multiple monsters though.

Edit: added in the second dwarf book — the anvil of doom taking a hero choices pushes the minimum up, while the required heavy armour pushes the maximum down.

I’m curious what the 5 models in a Chaos list that add up to 2,000 points by themselves are. It would be really wild to see that fielded against the 986 model O&G list! Crazy that both can add up to the same total since it looks like most other armies need 20 or so models to hit 2000.

It looks like this:
Lord of chaos on chariot of Tzeentch, mark of Tzeentch, skull of katam, crown of everlasting conquest, great weapon, shield: 599
Exalted champion of chaos, mark of Tzeentch, in chariot of Tzeentch, great weapon, shield, power familiar: 366
Exalted champion of chaos, mark of Tzeentch, in chariot of Tzeentch, great weapon, shield, mirror of knowledge, warrior familiar: 366
Exalted champion of chaos, mark of Tzeentch, in chariot of Tzeentch, great weapon, shield, 2 dispel scrolls: 366
Dragon Ogre Shaggoth, great weapon: 303
2000 points
5 models
17 power dice, 8 dispel dice
Choices used: 1 lord, 3 heroes, 4 core, 1 rare

Using your mount as a separate Core choice really helps keep the numbers down.

Deployment is silly. Place the Shaggoth, deploy the entire rest of your army all at once, done.

It may be fast to deploy, but all those ambitious power-crazed Tzeentch champions are going to make it a nightmare to keep as a coherent army. The political forces involved will tear it apart with infighting in very short order, especially if something happens to the Lord leading it.

That's perfectly okay; it's not an army. It's 5 champions (yes, the Shaggoth counts) and they're competing for who can kill the most on the other side. It's also why they have chariots, just like the ancient Greek heroes in the Iliad who, just like these five, were perfectly willing to challenge each other or abandon the rest if slighted and there wasn't someone right there to fight (I'm looking at you Achilles).

Winner takes all.